How to Eat an Elephant

It’s mulch time at Richmond Ropes. The sun is out, the weeds are coming up and the paths and ground around the elements are crying out ‘cover us!’ Over the past two months, I’ve been blessed with a crew of 5 guys whose mission-for two hours each week, at least-has been to help me in my mulching endeavor. They’re here to learn English at YWAM VA’s English Language and Culture School, and of all our students work for 2 hours each day to help keep the base running. Their tasks are usually pretty varied, but they got to know that when they saw me heading across the driveway at the beginning of work duty time, it was time to grab the shovels, pitchforks and wheelbarrows and head back to the ‘mountain,’ as they dubbed it, of wood chips (Picture: Pedro, one of my crew, loading mulch to take to the mountain). We made great headway over the almost two months we’ve worked together, and last week came the pinnacle of our efforts-at the end of each school, we set aside two days where students and staff work together to get the base ready for the next school and do other projects to improve our property and grounds. Our base director usually looks out for the ropes course and assigns me at least a few guys to help with the ‘man work’ of maintaining the course, and this time was no exception.

‘Ok, Beth,' you’re thinking, ‘what does all of this have to do with elephants?’ Don’t worry, it’s coming. I found out about my workday crew on a Friday. I was elated and immediately started calling our city dump (they offer free mulch to city residents) to find out when the front-end loader operator would be around to fill our ancient truck (I call her Bessie the Big Blue Truck-pictured left, at the dump on workday) with mulch. After several days of calling and missing him, I was moving from elated to desperate. Finally, the day before workday, the heavens opened and the voice on the other end of the line said ‘he’ll be here for 15 more minutes.’ I hopped in the truck, in my skirt and high-heeled sandals (I was slated to sing at church later that evening-but when the mulch man cometh, you don’t stop to change clothes), and, shortly thereafter found myself standing behind Bessie on the Low Circuit in my work clothes, holding a pitchfork and looking at an impossibly large load of mulch. I had to leave in a little over two hours—so, leaving time to put away tools, eat, and become presentable again, I had almost exactly an hour to do the work. Enough time for two strapping, strong guys-not enough for one spaghetti-armed girl.

I started shoveling and praying-‘God, how am I going to do this?’ The only answer I got was an old joke-the corny kind my family likes to call ‘John jokes’ because my Dad, John, loved them so much:

Q: ‘How do you eat an elephant?’ A: ‘One bite at a time’

So I kept shoveling, chipping away at my elephant one bite at a time. And as I shoveled, I thought. Shoveling is a great time to ponder things-from the physics of flying mulch to the events of your week to the mysteries of life.(Need some contemplative time? Give me a call and I can schedule a mulch meditation session for you, no problem. :) ) I had been struggling, the day before, with the enormity of my job as the ropes course director- groups, maintenance, repairs, scheduling, staffing, promoting, purchasing equipment-and had come to a place of crying out to God: ‘did you really call me to this? Because I CAN’T do it!’ As I thought through the events and conversation that had brought me to that point and tried to make sense of it all, I had one of those moments where God taps you on the shoulder and gently pulls you back from the tiny corner of the picture you’ve been studying to a place where you can see more, if not all, of it. And when He did, I saw a connection. The day before, my job had looked as impossible to me as the load of mulch had a few moments earlier. And the solution was the same: ask God, trust Him, and then start eating, one bite at a time.

I finished the shoveling just in time (Pictures: me and some of the workday crew shoveling even more mulch). I cleaned up and headed to church where the speaker talked about Elijah and the prophets of Baal-how Elijah had this huge thing to do (convincing Israel to turn from Baal worship back to the one true God by calling fire down on a soaking wet altar and sacrifice) that he couldn’t possibly do on his own. I felt God tapping me on the shoulder again as this gentleman challenged us to look at what we feel called to do and submitted that if it wasn’t too big for us to do on our own, it probably wasn’t of God. Because, let’s be honest-if it’s within our reach, we just do it. It’s only when it’s an elephant- or an impossibly large truckload of mulch- that we throw up our hands and say ‘help!’ and He has the opportunity to step in and be glorified as He shows us who He is.

So as you consider the elephant (or mountain of mulch) on your plate, let me give you a tip, one diner to another-there’s only one way to get it down. Paul describes it well: ‘We were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself…but that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again.’ II Cor 1:8-10

And, of course, one bite at a time. 

If you’ll excuse me, I think I hear God calling me to the table for another bite. Happy eating!


Praise God with Me:

+For a blessed, safe, productive and successful trip to the west coast for training and certification-God blessed me with increased experience, comfort, passion in the area to which He’s called me. He also blessed me with passing scores on both my tests and the awarding of my Level II certification, not to mention the financial and practical provision it took to get and keep me there.

+For the groups He’s bringing out to the course-our schedule is not yet as full as I’d like it to be, but there are several connections He’s made between us and ministries that I’m very excited to partner with in their work with at-risk kids.


Pray with Me:

+That I will continue to rely on God and not myself as I direct the ropes course. Particularly, that I won’t let financial (we owe some money to the base for building that was done before I became the director) or logistical (I am currently the only full-time staff on the ropes course, which is challenging in many areas) issues overshadow what God is calling me to-to be used by Him in the lives of at-risk kids through the ropes course.

+That God will bring more groups to the course. It’s sometimes quite frustrating to have this amazing tool and see it being used less often than it could be.

+That God will call and raise up at least one more full-time staff person for the course-I’m blessed with 14 volunteers, but all are committed primarily to other ministries and help out on the course in their spare time-which is limited.

+That God will equip and bless my volunteers as they serve Him on the course as well as in their own ministries, giving them energy, skill, discernment and words of encouragement for the participants.

But Not For Me...

‘they’re singing songs of love, but not for me/a lucky star’s above, but not for me’ (Not for Me, George Gershwin)

We had Launch Week at YWAM VA a few weeks ago. We spent 5 days together as a staff hearing and processing what our leadership council has heard from God about the direction of the base for the next 5 years.

One afternoon we spent an hour alone with God processing through everything, using 4 questions our base director (Chris is pictured, right)  had given us. At first, I was doing great-the direction God is showing them, ‘Passionately Follow God & Champion Young People’ lines right up with the vision God gave me when I left ‘normal life’ two years ago for YWAM. I had honestly almost forgotten the deep desire and passion God had given me-partly through my experience with the amazing teenagers He had blessed me with in Nashville (if you ever want to listen to me talk for at least an hour, ask me about my DSL kids, some of whom are pictured left)-to see young people equipped and reaching out for God-to their own generation, to other generations and even nations.

But as God often does, He had something up his sleeve for me when I hit the third question: ‘Lord do I have the faith to believe (what You are promising us by leading us in this direction)?’ I’m a verbal processor, so I often don’t find out what I’m really thinking or feeling until I start speaking or, in this case, writing. So when I read what I’d written: ‘Probably not. If by faith you mean I’ll be surprised or even crushed if it doesn’t happen, then no’ I was surprised, but knew when I asked myself if I really meant it, that I did. Not a great answer for someone-a missionary, for crying out loud-who is supposed to be living on faith, believing that God not only can, but WILL do the impossible to further His kingdom.

Some of you may remember that one of the lessons God taught me in my DTS had to do with asking ‘why not?’ when faced with the impossible. Instead of analyzing and criticizing and finding reasons why God is not behind something or why He won’t do something I’m hoping for, He called me to say ‘why not-why wouldn’t He? Why couldn’t He? He’s God-strong, loving, the whole deal.’ So seeing this on my paper was a little like an alcoholic coming to himself and finding that he’s sitting on a barstool with a beer in hand. Really, Beth? We’ve been through this! So I asked God why, and He showed me that ever since I put it all on the line-fasting, praying, crying, you name it-praying for God to save my marriage and He said, effectively, ‘no,’ I’ve been believing a lie. Instead of learning the healthy, true lesson that God does not always say yes and that that’s ok-that He’s God and does, in His ultimate strength and love, what pleases Him (which is ultimately what is best for me and the kingdom-as it was, in fact, in that case) I began to agree with George Gershwin… ‘a mighty God’s above (and will step in) but not for me’

But praise God, like that alcoholic, I’m going for ‘progress, not perfection’ and God is giving me, every day, a new chance to believe the truth and not the lie. Especially now that I know what it is. So here goes…see ya, Mr Gershwin.

Praise God with Me:

+for how He continually draws and teaches me these lessons, no matter how many times I end up back on that barstool :).

+for the new couple He added to my partnership team (financial and prayer supporters) and the potential partner He may be raising up.

+for the anonymous donor who paid my base fees for my time at our Salem, OR base (I’m going out for 2 months to train with the head of ropes course ministry in YWAM and to sit for two ropes certifications) and the other smaller but just as awesome ways He’s provided for me in the past few months as I’ve prepared for this trip.

Pray with Me:

+that God will provide the rest of what I need for my Salem trip-I leave Friday (3/5) and I still need several hundred dollars.

+that God will order my steps and help me to accomplish all I need to before I leave- I’ve just started to schedule for the 2010 season and have to put that on hold to go to Salem; our inspection is scheduled the week after I get back, and I need to pack and study, among other things.

+that God will be my strength (and that I would look to and rely on Him to be) as I’m in Salem, and especially when I travel to Seattle at the end of my trip to study and test for my Levels 1& 2 Association for Challenge Course Technology certifications.

+that God will step in (and that I will believe that He will) and do all that He desires to do in our ministry through the ropes course.

What I Learned from Emma & the Giant Swing

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go”   Joshua 1:9

I read this verse a few weeks ago in my quiet time. Then and every other time I’ve read it, I’ve always understood God to be saying that, first, Joshua should be strong and courageous and second, that being strong and courageous means that you do not feel fear or dismay.

A little girl showed me this Saturday that I was wrong. Emma is 6 years old and came to our base with her mom and dad who are pioneering a YWAM base in West Virginia. I had set up a video shoot for our ropes course promotional video that day, and so we’d invited Emma’s family to join us, and the youth we’d invited for the video, on the Giant Swing (picture above, me sending . We were almost done when Emma decided she’d like to go off of the swing, too. The best way for Emma to do that, since she’s so small, is to go in tandem with her dad, so both of them climbed up to join Chris, my base director (pictured, right, on the Swing), and I on the platform.

As soon as Emma reached the top, she started crying. We have a strong ‘challenge by choice’ policy at Richmond Ropes, so Chris and I began to try to comfort her and explain to her that she did not have to go off the swing if she didn’t want to. We could lower her back down the way she’d come up and no one would ever blame her for not going. She’d been plenty brave just to climb the more than 20 feet to the platform. But she was adamant-‘I want to go, I want to go’ all while clinging to her daddy and crying. We’d ask why she was crying, and she’d say ‘I’m afraid.’ But still, she stuck to her guns-she was going. Every once in a while she’d quiet and we’d take another step in the process of sending her-hooking her dad up and having him sit down, hooking her to her dad-and at each step, the crying would start again. And each time we’d say ‘You don’t have to go-are you sure you want to go?’ and through her tears, she’d say ‘yes!’ Up to and through the point when she and her dad left the platform, this continued. When she wasn’t crying, she was shaking, she was so afraid-but she wouldn’t back down.

Later that day I had an opportunity to tell Emma what God had used her to teach me-that fear and courage are not opposites. That perhaps the truest most impressive courage is shown when we act even though we’re afraid-when we refuse to give up on the challenge, even though we have to cling, crying and trembling, to our Father to make it through.

And when I reflected on all of this in light of Joshua 1:9 this morning, God helped me to understand even more. He was not telling Joshua it wasn’t ok to feel fear-fear is a feeling-feelings are given to us by God, and are often useful in handling and processing the situations He leads us into (thanks, Laurie). There are many of those situations (such as when one is standing on a 20+ foot platform about to step off into thin air) when not feeling fear is nothing short of stupidity-is, in fact, the sign of a dangerous insensitivity to reality. People who aren’t at least a little afraid in those kinds of situations end up falling off of the platform because they didn’t think it was important to hook in before they leaned over the edge to wave at the people on the ground. What’s not ok is to BE afraid, to allow fear to become not a feeling but an attitude or a state of being that keeps you from ever leaving the ground when God is calling you to climb.

And that’s what I learned from Emma and the Giant Swing.

Praise God with me:

+For a good first season directing Richmond Ropes-God carried me through so much and taught me so much! (including the lesson above :))

+For God’s provision-First, of a new windshield for my car-I was waiting until the crack got entirely across the windshield to pony up the dough to fix it, and almost the same week that happened, someone came to me and asked if they could buy me a new one! Second, of money for medicine when I had the swine flu (I got an anonymous gift the day before I got sick, for enough to make up the difference between what it cost and what I could pay). Third, airfare for my trip to Salem, Oregon for training in March-a friend is letting me use her frequent flyer award, all I have to do is pay a $50 fee.

Please Pray with me:

+That God will continue to teach and grow me through and equip me for what He’s calling me to do in Richmond.

+That God will provide the rest of what I need for my trip to Salem-I will have housing and living expenses while I’m there, as well as the cost of the training I’ll attend and the certification I’ll test for (and hopefully receive). And that He’ll help me and show me favor when I test for the certification-I actually have to test and pass two levels in 5 days, and this is an awful amount of time and money to spend if I don’t pass.

+That God will lead me in balancing the ropes course, my continued work in the urban ministry, fundraising, serving in my church, family, friends, and all of the other things on my ‘plate.’